just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
i believe in u and ur pee
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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