Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
