Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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