I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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