I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Shitshow foam night was such a success
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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