Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
