shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
