In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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