Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
you didnt know i had herpes?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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