Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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