I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
