Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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