I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
