For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
