shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
