My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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