super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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