Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
