sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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