im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
