he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
She tied me up with her honor cords...
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
