To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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