she was so not down for the gang bang
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
