You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
