Well apparently he's into motor boating.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Randomize
