do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Drunk is not a location!
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
