I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
