Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
