Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
