should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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