lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
