I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
