I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
