I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
