Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
