meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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