yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
