did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
