I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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