It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
