so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
