ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize