Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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