atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
