Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
