why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
