Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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