i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
