once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
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