is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
