I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Randomize